I Would Gladly Live In A Cardboard Box

If it came down to it, I would gladly live in a cardboard box for the rest of my life. And what I mean to say is I would gladly sell all of my possessions and live a meager existence all for the sake of my little boy. I would give up anything for that little guy. I don't know if it's because of some bad examples of parenting in the news lately, but I've been thinking about how much I love my "littleman" and how I'd do anything for him. I certainly have had my struggles as a new dad, especially in regards to dealing with a kid who throws up after every meal and battles colic on a nightly basis. I'm not above calling my kid a punk and getting upset when he cries. I've even put on my shooting range noise canceling ear muffs to deal with his high pitched screams before. But there is a sense of pride and responsibility that I have because of this little human being that sorta kinda looks like me.

There's an overwhelming sense of pride that I've found comes with being a father. Sure it's frustration to the point of wanting to pull your hair out, but the moment he farts and then smiles your heart could almost burst out of your chest with pride. It was a little more difficult when he was fresh out of the womb because he really didn't have that much of a personality to honest. But in his defense, when you're using all of your cognitive function not to be overwhelmed by all of the new things around you, that's everything to a baby, you don't have much more energy to expel on being interesting. However, now that he's a little older than three months his personality is developing, he can actually smile, and even roll over! I never thought I'd be so excited that a little human I made could do something my child hood dog could do by the time he was the same age. But I am, and it's an amazing thing to see this little person develop and grow.

I believe at least once, if not thousands of more times, in the history of fatherhood dads have felt this pride and been motivated to be better men and do whatever they can to better their child's life. But in that process often times fathers have done so at the expense of the relationship they have with their children. As my littleman grows and develops I have a sense of duty to continue to grow and become better myself. This little guy is eventually going to be mobile and start talking. I've really got to up my game and make sure that when he wants to start mirroring me and his mother that we're worth being mirrored. However I need to make sure that I don't get so caught up in the process of self improvement that I forget the point.

I never want to stop becoming a better father and I know there's nothing I wouldn't do for the kiddo. I would die for my little boy. But the challenging part of fatherhood isn't deciding to make a sacrifice just once, but living for him sacrificing every day. It's easy to die for someone, but so much harder to live for them...and that's what we're called to do as fathers. Now maybe you're not like me and been blessed with an amazing father to look back to as an example, but you know however how basic what a decent father looks like. And as long as you're trying, you're doing better than a lot of the fathers out there.